I used to judge moms without even realizing it. If I saw a temper tantrum, then that child needed some discipline; duh. If a toddler had trouble talking, I just assumed there was something his mom wasn't doing right. I judged moms who didn't spank, but when I saw one spank in public, I thought, "Eeee, that was kind of awkward. Mean mom!"
Then I had a kid. And I started giving other moms the benefit of the doubt, like, a lot. Motherhood is freakin' hard! No one knows a kid better than mom, and when it comes to any childhood issue, no one knows "the whole story" better than mom. So who am I to judge?
Ok, once in a while I am kind of tempted to judge. But all I have to do is recall any occasion in which I've felt judged, and I remember that I really don't know what the heck I'm talking about when it comes to the needs of any other kid. Seriously, I am so over "mompetition." Just parent the way your instincts tell you!
So with that in mind, I've compiled a little list of my "mommy confessions." Maybe you're going to judge me when you read them, in fact, you probably will, but hopefully they will just make you feel better about yourself and your role as a mom, because, guess what? I know you have some of your own! (which you can feel free to add in the comments section ... seriously, please make me feel better about myself...)
1. Recently, while trying to calm Darby during a meltdown induced by a long day and not enough sleep, I decided to try singing to her, which always helps. I went through the two lullabies that I actually know, several times, and I could tell she was getting "antsy" again, so I needed a new song, and quick. I wracked my brain and could come up with only one song that I know by heart from start to finish: "Whatta Man" by Salt 'n' Pepa. So I sang it ... er ... rapped it to her. Totally worked.
2. I am extremely dedicated to feeding my family well. We buy natural, organic products with low sodium, no high fructose corn syrup or preservatives, and I make everything from scratch, including bread and even hamburger buns. We don't keep white flour or white sugar in the house because I don't use it in anything. However, I am obsessed with the $1 chocolate dipped cones from McDonald's. Obsessed. I actually know which McDonald's in the area make the largest ones, and which make the smallest, which make ones that melt everywhere, and which do it right. (If you're wondering, the downtown Saratoga Mickey D's makes the best by far, but you will pay for it; they're a little pricier there.) Yes, I am that person.
3. Motherhood knocked me off my feet at first. (I'm a total pro now! Hahaha ... haha ... ha) Seriously, it took me a bit to adjust to my life never being the same. Once, when Darby was a newborn, I stayed up really late after she finally fell asleep, just reading, eating chocolate, doing my nails and other stuff. The next morning when she woke bright and early at 7am, I just knew I needed more sleep or I would have nothing to give her. So I picked her up, brought her into the huge walk-in closet in our old one bedroom apartment, and nursed her in the pitch dark so that she would think it was still nighttime and go back to sleep for an hour or so. Newborns are silly like that and it totally worked. (I only did this once because I felt so bad that I never let it happen again! But seriously, who feels me on this. Anyone? Anyone?)
4. I rock my 14 month old to sleep. Every night. This is my biggest confession because I know that the authors of "Babywise" would dope slap me for this. The truth is I actually created this monster because I started doing it to help her to sleep while she was teething her first molars and I felt bad letting her cry in pain by herself every night. But I'm pretty sure she's not getting any molars right now ... and I'm still doing it. She stands directly up in her crib, reaches for me and cries "Momma!" when I try leaving the room. And I think to myself, "I don't care if some people think I'm making her into a spoiled brat with a lifetime of insomnia ahead of her; I'm doing what my instincts tell me, and right now my instincts tell me that far too quickly my little baby reaching for me from her crib will be a teenager who I am reaching for as she walks out the door with no desire or need for me at all. She will not always need me to rock her to sleep, she will not always need me more than anything, and when that day comes, it will be over; this moment will never come again, so I'm not wasting it while it's here. Besides, my mom rocked me to sleep until I was 18 months old, and I've never struggled with insomnia in my life!"
So there's my list. I'm sure I'll add more, but in the meantime, do you have any you'd like to share? ;)